Marine Corps Marathon #2

It hurts so good!

Man I love marathons!

This one kicked my BUTT, but it was awesome!!! A perfect day for a race. The morning was hectic - I was going to metro from a nearby station to the Pentagon stop (Arlington was closed, meaning that once I got to the Pentagon station, I had to walk over a mile to the start line!) but I ended up taking a bus down to another metro stop and riding from there. While waiting for the bus, I managed to meet a woman who had travelled from the Dominican Republic to DC for the race and we rode together. We picked up another marathoner on the bus and it was actually pretty fun!

I managed to find my parents right away at the metro stop and we worked our way out and to the race start. It was chaotic. We ended up waiting in line for about 25 minutes so that I could use a port-a-potty and then I had to run to the start line (about another quarter mile from the portapotties!). So in general - lots of walking/running before the race even started. Not very cool.

So the race started but I didn't even cross the starting line until about 10 minutes after the gun went off. The Marine Corps Marathon is wonderfully crowded with runners and spectators. It's amazing - you really feel like people are there just for YOU. Even if you don't know them! If you ever want an ego boost, sign up for a race. People will tell you how awesome you are!

I feel like I didn't train well enough for this one. By mile 5, I was wishing I had eaten more breakfast. By mile 15, I was exhausted. By mile 18, my knees were aching. I felt out of it. I couldn't find my family and was doing this kind of hyper-heaving thing that was kind of uncontrollable for a few minutes around mile 20. I swore so loudly during the Crystal City part that I jolted another woman into running faster just to get away from me. I was hurting.

But I still managed to finish in 4:15:40 - almost 10 minutes off my previous MCM time! And by the time I saw my family, I was just so happy to see them that nothing else mattered!

During the race, I saw a man pushing his disabled son. His son couldn't move and his dad was pushing him up a hill when I saw them. Everyone was cheering for them and it was so touching. That kind of determination really reminds you of what love really is. You bare your whole soul in a marathon even when you're not pushing someone else. I can't even imagine how tough you have to be physically and mentally to do that. Needless to say, I was impressed.

At the end of the race, they really corral the runners. After I got my medal I managed to trip on the sidewalk and almost fell into a Marine, who grabbed my hand and asked, "Ma'am, are you ok?" (they called me ma'am all weekend but it somehow didn't make me feel old. When a Marine calls you ma'am, you feel sexy!). I somehow grunted, "where is the water??" and he pointed me in the right direction and asked if I needed help. I'm pretty sure he would have carried me if I had said yes, but I said I was ok and stumbled on. I managed to find my parents right away, which was sooo lucky. No begging strangers to let me use their cell phones!

Today, I'm pretty sore and sleepy. But I'm so excited to do another one! When I was going across the bridge at mile 20 (complete agony, I hate that bridge!), I thought to myself - I should only be allowed to sign up for these stupid things within days of completing one so that I remember how agonizing they are! But I'm completely ready to sign up for one, even though less than 24 hours ago I was wheezing and ready to break down and beg for mercy (from whom I don't know, but I was ready).

Now the only question is: which one?

I am RUNNER, hear me....roar?

One of the things that's been on my mind lately: I've taken to calling myself a "runner." I don't know when that happened. For a long time, anytime anyone called me a runner, I'd say, oh no, I wouldn't go that far, it's just a hobby. But somewhere in between the 3rd and 4th marathon, I've started to adopt the title. Someone asks "oh, you're a runner?" and my response will be, "yes."

But am I?

what IS a runner anyway? I am and always will be a human being. And a girl. But will I always be a runner? Am I runner if I stop doing marathons? Am I a runner if I never compete in any races? Am I a runner if I never qualify for any race? Am I a runner if I don't like to run in the rain (I don't)? Am I a runner if I wear Nikes? What about if I run barefoot? What about if I run really slow?

What makes someone a runner? I can't figure it out and I can't figure out why I'm suddenly comfortable calling myself one. It seems cocky and a bit insulting to all the real runners out there to give myself a title like this. But then again...what distinguishes a "real runner" from me? I can only think of 2 things:

1. speed
2. endorsements

And perhaps real runners don't even consider things like this. Maybe they just know.

Can I ever overcome the hurdles I've set up for myself and finally allow myself to just be "runner?"

Why are you running a marathon?

As marathon season really kicks in, I do more reading on the subject. I was reading something (I don't remember what) and it asked the very annoying question: why are you running a marathon?

Well geez. That's actually kind of tough to answer.

I mean...why 26.2 miles? We all know WHY that's a marathon distance but why is that the distance that I personally am choosing to run? Is it because I want to compete? No...I'm actually not an incredibly competitive person (although research DOES indicate that I can run a marathon faster than Ted Koppel, Al Gore, AND Oprah and this makes me feel ridiculously proud...I don't think this necessarily counts as competitive. It's more bratty than anything). Is it because after 26.2 miles my body just gives up? Well no, obviously it doesn't since I managed 43 miles earlier this year.

Is it because I love torturing my friends and family by making them sit out in the sun/rain/heat/cold for hours just to glimpse me for 30 seconds? No, I really do feel guilty about that sometimes.

I really can't put my finger on "why" I decided it would be a good idea to do this. It's just a part of me now. It's what I do. I run marathons and they pull me in, time after time. Even when it hurts. Even when training is inconvenient. I just can't resist the thought of a marathon.

Napa Valley or Edinburgh?

So I'm slowly getting over the crushing depression caused by the Boston Marathon already being full. I mean, am I really even ready to run a marathon in 3:40? Could I even do it? Did I train well enough? Will I ever be able to conquer this goal wearing the restrictive shoes of our generation? Surely I will be able to do this after I switch to barefoot running?

Originally, I assumed that I'd sign up for the DC marathon in March. I like it, I know it, it's where I PRed. But I'm kind of curious to do other marathons. There are a lot of spring and fall marathons, but you have to pick and choose them because it's not like I'm able to do them every other week (physical toll too high, finances too low). So I did some investigating and here are the two frontrunners:

Napa Valley Marathon
Edinburgh Marathon

Thoughts? Opinions? Please vote, which one is best?!?

(Oh by the way...London in out since I didn't get in the international ballot :( I'm striking out with the ones I originally thought I wanted)

FAIL

I have failed my stated marathon goal ALREADY and I haven't even run the race!!!

Boston is full!

No one new can register for Boston 2011!

Even if I qualify, I can't go!

Feeling pretty bummed out right now...

Common Sense

It is, unfortunately, starting to become fall and then winter. When I get up in the morning, it is dark. When I leave the office at the end of the day, it is dark. When I go out at lunchtime, I have to wear a coat. I am sad.

My training is currently in "taper" mode so that I don't overtrain before the marathon (10 days away!!!!!!!!!!!!), so I'm not doing a ton of extremely long runs. But whenever I leave my house on weekdays now, I have to wear bright clothing and my reflective vest. Because it's DARK outside, this seems like common sense to me. Cars + cyclists = danger. Even in daylight these are two categories of transportation that inspire the least amount of caution. No one can drive in DC (it's proven, google it, we have the worst drivers) and the cyclists are all...well...assholes. Let's face it. They kind of have to be to survive the horrible drivers, but it irritates the heck out of me when I'm running because they decide that no matter where they are riding, on the street, on the sidewalk, on the grass, on your treadmill, that they are the ones who get the right of way. My dream is to flip off a cyclist one day when they ding their stupid bell at me, but I'm afraid that they will grab my middle finger and drag me to the ground so I restrain myself.

I'm sorry, this is really not a post about how much I hate people on bicycles...

This is a post about how stupid runners can be.

So I'm out in my reflective vest, sometimes I even throw a little light on just to be extra safe, and I see runners wearing ALL BLACK. Black leggings, black shirt. And headphones. Scampering around the city like they own it and it just blows my mind. How would that EVER seem like a good idea? Black is slimming yes. Getting run over by a truck is also slimming in that you're squashed against the pavement.

I can't decide if there needs to be more awareness efforts (Lululemon, do you sell stylish reflective vests yet?) or what, but it's really amazing to me how many people are out there in their headphones and black spandex thinking that the DC cab drivers are going to be paying enough attention to stop in time. It just gives runners everywhere a bad name and is dangerous to boot.

Can anyone offer some insight into what these people are thinking?

Musings

I know that I promised an exciting article about the book "Born to Run" but since I bought it on Barnes & Noble.com, somehow downloaded it to my ipod, and now lost it, I have not been able to finish listening to it. Technology and me, grr. We do not get along.

Besides, I have so many other insights that come from ME and not from someone else's book, so if you really want to know what is so great about "Born to Run" go buy yourself a copy for goodness sake. (Or just wait until I get around to posting my thoughts on it...)

On Sunday, I went to a Yoga for Runners workshop. It was with my favorite yoga instructor and was fun for several reasons:

1. the actual amount of yoga done was extremely limited
2. everyone in the room was a runner and not a yogi, so it was noisy, fun, and no one was really able to do anything correctly the first time.
3. because the room was full of people who had probably never done yoga before, I felt very accomplished in my own yoga history.

The stretches were runner-centric and made us all feel like it was okay to have tight hamstrings.

But...OK. I'm totally going to bring it some anecdotes from the book. In "Born to Run," there is a line that sticks in my brain - you don't need to do yoga. You don't even need to STRETCH AT ALL to become a better, faster runner.

CAN WE ALL JUST TAKE A MOMENT TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I HAVE BEEN SAYING THIS ALL ALONG?????

Now, let's try to decide who is right. My favorite yoga instructor, who I really like and respect, kept talking about the benefits of stretching and even brought out a skeleton to illustrate her points on why muscles that are connected can cause great injury if you treat them badly. And I totally get that. I totally understand the explanation but my body does not respond well to stretching. Yesterday I went running less than 24 hours after the yoga class and felt MORE TIGHT than I had in weeks.

I mean, maybe there is something to be said for constant yoga and stretching, but I still just can't get behind it. I can't find the drive to do that. The whole time, it's just a constant hum in my brain: "I'd rather be running."

Back in the game

Wow...I am pathetic. No blog posts since JULY?!?

First: how is it suddenly October 12?
Second: how did I miss blogging my 24 hour race?
Third: how can I be doing a marathon in 19 days?

Lots of questions are running through my head now. I can't answer all of them. For example: I cannot answer my first question. That's just the way it is. Time passes and suddenly you find yourself in October. No one asks you if you want a little more time in August. Time just goes, goes, goes, goes.

How did I miss blogging my 24 hour race? Shame mostly. I did a mere 43 miles instead of the 52 that I wanted. How could I possibly face you after such shame?

Haha...I actually have a completely positive opinion of my 24 hour race. I had the BEST TIME EVER. All day, just running, surrounded by runners and the people who love them. My parents spent ALL DAY with me, supporting me and my mom even ran my last 8 mile lap with me ("ran" is a nice way of putting it...by that point I was kind of limping). I learned a few key lessons. We stopped at the hotel midway and that was where I crashed. I need to stay in the zone the whole time and not back into the real world. The world that I run in is very different from the real world.

In general, I wholeheartedly recommend doing a 24 hour race if you love running. It really inspires you and makes you feel like you have accomplished something great.

Ok, that was the 24 hour race. Now, the Marine Corps Marathon looms large on Halloween. Having made my goal to qualify for Boston, this race has been especially terrifying. I don't want to fail. The worst part about not wanting to fail is that it makes you not want to try. If you don't try, then you can at least say that it was possible. If you try and fail, then you're just a big fat failure. It wasn't possible. You couldn't do it and you didn't. On the other hand, if I try, at least I get to run a marathon. I really do hate time goals and qualifying events. If only I hadn't gotten it in my head that it would be a good idea to try for this...now I can't get it out.

I am currently reading the book Born to Run. It's pretty much changing my life. I am fully expecting to write an entry soon about barefoot running. Stay tuned.

A 24 hour race??

I am...

SO.

EXCITED.


But I feel so guilty. A marathon is one thing to expect people to attend; a 24 hour race is not something that I was really counting on anyone to come to. I mean, sure, I thought I might guilt-trip my boyfriend and parents into making it for a few hours. But now it's turned into a trip with a hotel and people planning their entire weekends around selfish little me.

It's been driving me crazy and kind of killing my excitement.

I think this might be the kind of thing that you sign up for with an equally crazy friend and then make it into a weekend trip. My problem? I haven't actually been able to find someone who's willing to take it to this level of extreme with me. Don't get me wrong, all of my friends are EXTREME and I love them. But no one is willing to run all day with me, what gives folks?

Putting aside guilt, I have to just be thankful that I have such amazing people in my life who are willing to go the extra mile and be there for me. And that allows the joy and the adrenaline to flow back in. I'm really falling in love with the IDEA of a whole day dedicated to running. Now let's see how it goes with the actual action!

Wish me luck, in less than 48 hours, I'll already be done with it!

100 Posts!!!!!!!

I would like to kick off this monumental moment of 100 posts in my running blog by talking about….spinning.

Yup, last night I went to an hour long spinning class at my air-conditioned gym.

I was struck by how spinning classes are kind of like races. You don’t have a ton of your own space, you can’t really avoid the people all around you, and you have to maintain your own pace, form, and speed while looking at everyone else’s efforts. I’m also always reminded both in races and in group exercise classes that I can’t judge people by their shape. I’ve had bigger people pass me in races and last night I saw larger women outlast the skinny chick who seemed to be giving it her all but had to leave 15 minutes before the class ended. Did she work harder? That I can’t answer, but she certainly didn’t work longer.

I have to admit that sometimes I really do want to judge people by their size. Then I’m always reminded of the very inspiring movie classic, Mean Girls (yes, I am being sarcastic, I know it’s not a classic). In the end, our heroine Lindsay Lohan learns that it’s not about what people look like, it’s what’s going on INSIDE. And the truth is that you really can’t tell what people are capable of just by looking at them. We need to give everyone in every race the same benefit and the same support.

LIFE LESSON LEARNED. Kind of. At least I can put it into words.

The Things You See

It's amazing what you can see on a run. Especially a three hour run.

In general, I think I've seen a lot of DC that most people don't get to see. I get to see a lot of things in general that most people don't get to see. I've witnessed people in love, people crying, people angry at each other, people smiling with their families. I've seen more nature than I ever thought possible in a city, including:

1) foxes
2) raccoons
3) a deer that scared the HECK out of me
4) turtles
5) squirrel conventions

I've seen the sun rise over our nation's Capitol and I've seen rain fall like it would never stop. Running has opened my eyes to a world that I never knew was there and I'm so amazed every time that I get out at what the world can hold.

Tourists

This weekend, I did close to 30 miles. 20 on Saturday and about 7.5 on Sunday. My body is quite fine and I wish that I had given myself the chance to go all the way to 30. I think I'll definitely be in pain during the 24 hour race, but hopefully I'll be able to do a substantial amount of mileage.

Did I mention that I finally got a new fuel belt? I was out running at least a month ago with my old one when it suddenly just completely fell apart on me. It was a very sad day, most of all because I had to abandon the idea of a long run and head home. But now it has been replaced with a new one and it is PINK. Even the water bottles have pink lids. How can I complain when I have a pink fuel belt? And it seems to be less prone to falling apart so I am all set.

I also got a new pair of running shoes last week (Nike of course) and tried out a new flavor of GU - vanilla. I was kind of nervous about it, but it ended up being pretty good. However, with the heat lately, I've been considering switching to the chews/chomps/whatever. They're fruit flavored and perhaps slightly more refreshing...however, I've also been running with Gatorade because I've been too lazy to drag it home from the store. When I have fruity Gatorade, the fruit chomps are overwhelming and I like to stick to the ice cream flavors of GU.

Isn't it amazing that I can talk about GU and chomps and you're still reading my blog?

During my long run on Saturday, I was thinking about several things. But I was running in the heat of day and therefore ran into a lot of tourists (despite designing my run to be in the least tourist-dense but still safe areas) and was plagued by a horrible nemesis: SMOKE. People walking around, smoking their cigars, smoking their cigarettes. Puff, puff, puff. HACK. Whenever I see someone smoking, I want to take their cigar/ette and stamp it out right in front of them. And scold them. Harshly. And perhaps punch them in the face (ok ok we know I'd never do that). Especially young people. Old people, ok, I get it, you didn't know the risks when you started. But young people? Seriously? I don't get how it can seem like a good idea in 90 degree weather to light something on fire, stick it in your mouth, and inhale the grossness that comes out.

Of course, they probably don't see how it could be a good idea to run 20 miles in 90 degree weather....

However, this still does not trump my #1 pet peeve of tourists. They will always, ALWAYS walk 5 abreast on the paths around DC and ALWAYS stare blankly at me as I approach them. And continue to watch me as I stumble over tree roots, dog poo, and cars because they REFUSE TO MOVE OVER. If you were in Spain for the running of the bulls, you'd move over right? I'm going to start wearing bull horns. Maybe then they'll get the picture.

For Reals, People

Boy, what a sloppy bag of sappy emotion I've been! Those last two blog posts, whoo! Did you make it through ok? Did I get some of the snot of my emotional outburst on you? Wipe it off, you'll be fine, and let's freaking talk about RUNNING here folks.

Yesterday I went out for a run and was really hoping to just go for an easy 4-5 miles. That turned into an easy 8 miles, which was just wonderful. I love it when you feel like you can just go on forever. I got pretty losy but luckily not lost enough to end up in Maryland or anything and I did run into a nice fellow who directed me in the right direction. It's fun to get lost, even in a city that you think you know. It was absolutely PERFECT weather and I was feeling fabulous. Lately I'd been feeling like running was catching up with me and I'd have to take a break - then I went out last night and rediscovered the fire!

Oh it is SO back on, this running biz-nas!

Why run?

When I tell people that I run marathons, a lot of the time they don’t understand why. It doesn’t make a lot of sense to people and quite honestly, sometimes when I think about it, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me either. I want to do a lot of things in my life, I want to travel and save the world and be a hero. I want to help people and improve their lives. Training for a marathon means that I spend a lot of my time…running. Running around in DC with headphones in, completely oblivious to the rest of the world, in anti-social, hard-core runner mode, trying to escape the thoughts that mess with my head. This is not very conducive to saving the world, no matter how you spin it.

It’s been 9 days since I lost my grandpa. He was 91 and finally, on May 29, was ready to go home to Heaven. It’s been hard to try to put into words how I feel. He was, to me, more than anything, just a grandpa, a man who spoiled me and loved me. But after he died, I suddenly realized how much more he was. I always knew his history, but seeing it in writing in an obituary, made me realize how overwhelming his presence in the world was. My grandpa was, in the words of my friend GutsyGeise, a big deal.

Realizing that I have that big deal stuff in my blood sometimes makes me feel pressure to be as great of a person as he was. It’s not bad, this pressure, but it kind of makes me wonder why I’m not out there, doing more and accomplishing great things. Sometimes, much to my dismay, running seems like a colossal waste of time.

And then what happens is that I skip running to do great things and end up watching tv or taking bubble baths, which is all very nice at the time, but really, an even bigger waste of time. Running might be a silly side hobby but it keeps me focused in my life. I can’t tell you how annoyingly often I find myself in a situation at work, personally, and suddenly compare it to a long-distance run. Running has taught me self-discipline, focus, and humiliation. I sometimes forget the lessons that I learn on the road.

I think my grandpa would be proud that I ran 20 miles this weekend. I think that he’d be proud of me for doing a marathon in under 4 hours and I think he’ll be proud of me when I qualify for Boston. As stupid as it might seem to an outsider, I really do think that I’m changing the world when I go out and run, because I’m changing my own world and isn’t that where all change starts?

A for Effort? No.

I was reading some previous entries and even nostalgically reading my old blog from when I studied abroad in Spain. In general, I really enjoy blogging because I absolutely love to talk and to share stories and this way it's all consolidated in one place for me. I was always kind of all of the place as a kid. I really, really, really wanted to keep faithful journals like my sister or to be dedicated to a diary like my childhood hero, Anne Frank. But I would buy a journal that I thought was pretty, keep going for about 5 1/2 days, start doodling, forget I had it, buy a new journal 6 months later and then start the process all over again. If I try to read one of them, it makes NO sense at all, particularly because it's almost impossible to ascertain when I was writing because I never found actually put the date on anything. You can occasionally tell if it's Christmas, because I liked to write about getting presents, but in general they are a bleary mess of childish melodrama, shockingly awful sketches, and animal print covers. Yup. Animal print.

So now, I currently have 3 blogs, but this is the only one that I update. I still have the one from Spain and I have my sad attempt at being a personal motivator, TrainerMennone, which died a sad death last year. I have an on again, off again relationship with this blog, with monthes going by without a word, your tears staining your own keyboard (which unfortunately, I cannot see, so that doesn't really bother me) with sorrow and sense of loss.

The thing that's bothering me today is that when I look over the last few entries, I'm not really sharing any valuable information. I'm kind of just a) whining, b) chattering, or c) mumbling. You can even mumble in blogs, those are the entries where it kind of wanders, makes no sense, jumps around, and finally settles with some lame attempt at a pithy, witty end. Have I stopped learning? Do my runs teach me NOTHING anymore? Am I just not running enough? I don't really know the answers to these questions, but I need to decide what I'm getting out of this. Running is not about just going through the motions. I need to feel myself run, understand what it is doing to my body. I want to remind myself of the connection I create with the pavement with each step. How else will I ever run 52.4 miles if I don't take the time to understand what running does to me?

I hate it when people half-ass their way through life. I have to remind myself that everything I'm doing is adding up to something greater. Each day is a part of my whole being and making it worthwhile means making every single moment worthwhile.

Whenever I run a race, my dad says to me, as encouragement I suppose, "Win!" It's less of a cheer than a command and I think that I need to hear it like...every day. It's his way of reminding me to do my best and not float through the race. Taking it to heart, I've decided that I'm not going to float through life. I'm going to take it day by day and WIN every time.

Goal for my 24 hour race

When I signed up for the 20in24 race, I hadn't really decided if I wanted to set a serious goal. The idea of more than 26.2 miles is hard enough to wrap my head around, let alone an actual concrete milestone to hit.

But I've been really thinking about things and I've decided to go for 52.4 miles. Originally, I was just going to go for 50, $10 for every mile that I run to raise the $500 that I'm fundraising for Back On My Feet. But then I thought...well, the reason why I'm doing this is to do more than a marathon. Why not just try to do 2 marathons in one day?

Logical perhaps to me, although I'm sure the reasoning is lost on most people...

Then I read this fantastic article in the NY Times: Diet and Exercise to the Extremes. Did it inspire me to become a vegan? Well...no, not really. It did inspire me to perhaps make a salad to have with dinner tonight though, does that count? Did it inspire me to want to run 100 miles? No, not really. But it does remind me that the human body is completely capable of doing this. 50 may seem like a lot, but I think I can handle it. And who knows? Maybe 100 won't be so far after that.

Oh yeah, I'm still in the middle of fundraising so don't forget to click and donate!!

Also, I'm only 6 posts away from 100 posts in this little blog! If I post something every day for the next week, we can celebrate...haha yeah right.

Incredible!

A few weeks ago, I stumbled upon one of the most amazing opportunities in the world: Nike Running Correspondent.

Naturally, I applied, including a quote from this little blog thingy I do here. Now all I can do is wait until July 1st! If you feel nice, post a comment on why I should be the next Nike Running Correspondent so that if any Nike folks visit my blog, they have your recommendation on hand!

Went to the gym during my lunch break today...I tell you, nothing will energize you more for the afternoon than working up a good sweat!

If you're going to pass, you have to commit

I’d like to start this post off by saying that I do not have a problem with people passing me. I am not so proud that I think that I’m faster than everyone. Running is a popular sport/pastime in DC and people often pass me. Sometimes it’s someone who I don’t really think could pass me. But, I don’t really get bent out of shape about it. I just like to run.

That being said…I’m really not THAT slow either. I am trying to qualify for Boston, after all. Let’s give me SOME credit here.

Also, important to note, I have a serious issue with space when exercising. I blame my mom for this. It’s in my genes. I hate being too close to someone when there’s all this extra space. Like in yoga class, when someone puts their matt 3 inches away from mine when there could be 6 inches of space between us. It makes me antsy. Anxious. I instantly loathe that person. Obviously, this does wonders for my yoga practice.

The point of this story, my good friends?

The other day I was running. (I can hear your groans as I prolong this moment). I was doing a longer run, about 9 miles, so I wasn’t sprinting or going ridiculously fast. I didn’t have any water with me, so it’s not like I was properly fueling. I got to a nice pass along the Potomac (yes, I still have nightmares about my hour in those deathly waters) and was just enjoying a beautiful run on a beautiful day. I had noticed a pair of runners, a guy and girl, who were a little bit behind me, so I sped up a little to get some room between us.

After I had found my pace again, I was a bit surprised to see the girl come up from behind me to pass me. But, like I said, I am not really proud and didn’t really care. I waited for her to get out of my way.

She did NOT. Instead, she passed me and then got right in front of me, like DIRECTLY in front of me, and immediately slowed down. So that she was going about half a pace too slow for me.

OMG ROAD RAGE.

As soon as she did this, I realized that she had no real interest in passing me, she just wanted to get in front of me. Which a) pissed me off and b) made me paranoid about where the guy was, was he waiting behind me? Were they going to try to trap me and steal me as some sort of bizarre slave who would lick their running shoes clean?

So I had to kick it up and ran around her and kept my pace up for a lot longer to avoid them. I really don’t think they were malicious. But for goodness sake, who does that? In a race…I understand the space issues that come with racing. But in the middle of an open sidewalk, running path? With no one else around? Why in the world would that seem like a good idea?

People, please. If you’re going to pass someone, make sure you can commit to it and really pass them. It will make you a faster runner and a far more polite individual.

PS. Signed up for the 2011 London ballot for international runners. I hope I get in! The ballot closed in less than 24 hours, I’m so glad I signed up when I did! In October, I hope I’m writing a post about how I’ll be marathoning through London!

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Something new to occupy my time?

Well now that I'm all recovered and bored again, I need to find something to occupy my time while I wait for the Marine Corps Marathon to qualify for Boston. You know, other than train for a marathon, be a bridesmaid in 2 weddings, continue to excel in my job, plan imaginary trips to Europe, clean my house, and take Spanish and/or Italian lessons.

I HAVE FOUND IT!

THE RACE OF RACES!!!!!

BWAHAHAHH!

Ok, stay with me here. I know that it looks kinda crazy. But you have to a) acknowledge that I am crazy and b) understand that I have become quite capable of distinguishing between events that are fun just because they sound crazy and events that I actually want to do. I have been nonchalantly deleting all emails that come to me asking me to sign up for another triathlon, because God knows that I am NOT doing one of those again. Why does a 24 hour race appeal to me? Well...

1) I love to run. I would love to spend a day running! Just all day! No other time committments, no other activities that I will have to do. Just running, running, running.
2) It would actually help me to train for the Marine Corps Marathon and Boston.
3) It's in JULY and I LOVE to run in the heat!
4) SOFT. PRETZELS.

I think I'm talking myself into this...

Euphoria!

3:59:36!!!!

I feel like everyone should know that I finished a marathon in 3:59:36!! Without the best training, without jet packs on my back, without having to get an IV drip at the end (although I did have to visit the medical tent), I finished 26.2 miles in UNDER 4 hours. My joy peaked throughout the weekend as I celebrated my ability to walk (however slowly) without aid after running my personal best and the acknowledgement that Boston is perhaps actually within my reach. I feel like this is a life changing event and my life has been enhanced greatly. I looked at myself in the mirror on Saturday and thought to myself, “there is more to me than what used to be.”

And yet, nothing has REALLY changed. I got up this morning and went to work. There was no huge celebration for my victory. My boyfriend took me out on Saturday for a falafel dinner and then we went home and passed out. My parents were strangely absent, due to my insistence that this was not an important race and I was not going to do well and didn’t need everyone to be there. Today I am at work and beyond the inner circle of friends that I have made, no one knows that the reason why I am walking so slowly/like a cripple is because I pushed my body beyond normal limitations. My bank account is no larger, my goals in life have pretty much stayed the same. The race felt life-altering upon completion, but now all it serves to do is make my own life, as happy and busy as it is, seem mundane and dull by comparison. No one cheers me on as I complete my daily tasks at work. At the grocery store, no one is yelling at me, “don’t quit!!” I do not put on body glide to face the other commuters on the bus and I do not slurp any GU to help me make it up and down the stairs of my office.

In this race, I pushed myself harder than I had before. For the first 20 miles, I was looking at my watch and pushing myself to make each mile by a certain time. I was IN the race, rather than just participating. I didn’t expect to WIN, but once I passed 14 miles in 2 hours, I knew that I was going to PR. And I wanted it, badly. In this way, this race was better than any other I’ve ever done. After running a race like this, I know that I can never go back to just running a race. This race set the standard for any race that I may do in the future.

For a while I thought I might make the Boston qualifying (3:40). But I didn’t, and in a way, I didn’t want to. I wanted to save that moment. And in a way, I couldn’t. By mile 21, I was pretty much done. Thoughts of quitting flirted with me. The race took an ugly turn for the last 6 miles, through junkyards and over bridges in Anacostia. No one was cheering. I didn’t want to run anymore. I wanted to walk. I slowed down significantly, turning my sub-9 minute miles into over 10 minute miles. By the time I finally found my boyfriend at mile 26, I yelled to him “under 4 hours!!” because I was still barely under the 4 hour mark. He pushed me forward – if I hadn’t seen him, if he hadn’t given me that last burst of energy, I think I would’ve hit 4 hours. But I did. Running past the finish line, I thought that everyone should be amazed by my accomplishment.

After finishing and taking as many post-race goodies as I could fit in my arms (and getting the most BEAUTIFUL medal yet), I tottered around until I found my boyfriend. Then collapsed. My friend GutsyGeise came to show her undying support and I was cranky and unbelievable un-charming to her. After lying in the sun for about an hour, I declared, “I want to go home!” like a stubborn 5 year old and then limped slowly around in a circle before stating “I want to find the medical tent!” I was feeling incredibly nauseous and walking did not help. So my patient companions found the medical tent for me and waited outside while I was given an anti-nausea pill and sat for a few minutes in the shade (the weather, btw, was GORGEOUS and sunny and warm for the race. But almost hot upon completion). Some guy tried to chat with me about the hills of the course and I couldn’t understand why I had to be social while sitting in the medical tent. 3 people were sitting/lying down with IVs in their arms and a tiny part of me felt that they must have run harder than me.

And since then I have basically been sleeping, eating, and walking slowly and unsteadily around Washington, DC. In a small way, this is one of my proudest achievements. It is something that I did on my own that not many of my peers have done. It is an accomplishment that I am savoring, holding as my own. I humbly acknowledge that there are plenty of people out there who can do much better than me, but at the same time I am actually allowing myself to feel pride for this. I find that to be kind of hard to do, but at the same time, I really believe that I earned it. I’m not running around with my medal on (although I did wear it around my apartment after seeing that I placed 982 in the whole race), but I’m not going to just let this be another weekend. I want to work hard and do better and get this euphoric feeling back again. I want to earn it and not just have it be handed to me.

I am ready to qualify for Boston.

IGNORE-ance is bliss

Tomorrow is my marathon and last night I almost couldn’t sleep because my heart was pounding every time I thought about it (perhaps it was the earplugs I was wearing…they block outside noise but amplify anything going on in my body). Today I am going to pick up my packet and I’ve been looking at the map a little. The main goal is not to panic here, because that never helped anyone. And really, I am excited. Even though I’m starting to get a cold. And my legs are somehow tight even though I’ve done VERY little this week (I’m feeling quite sloth-like, a marathon is sounding like good fun).

I find that the best thing to do is not to think about the marathon tomorrow. I know some people are memorizing the map, analyzing the incline on Googlemaps…but I can’t do that. I can’t think about it too much because I will absolutely lose my mind! If I can just take my mind off it, then when someone haphazardly asks me, “hey you’re doing a marathon tomorrow?” I can reply with, “yeah, no big deal (nbg is what the kids are saying)” and people will think I am super cool.

Bwahah if only they knew!

Let's do a marathon?

On Saturday, I will run a marathon.

Why is this not bothering me more? My training has not extended beyond a 15 mile run. That’s still 11 more miles to go! The snow kept me inside on the treadmill which I hate, and left the experience of running outside as a hazy memory. And yet I’m nonchalantly mentioning this as if it’s not a big deal to run 26.2 miles.

Ha. Nonchalant. Last night I woke up and thought to myself, “I am insane.”

Luckily I KNOW that I am insane, so I’m pretty sure that I’ll make it through. Probably not very fast, although I did just realize that the last 5 or so miles are through Anacostia. If you don’t know where Anacostia, DC is, then look it up. I will potentially be running very fast for the last 5 miles.

I got a PaceTat, which is a temporary tattoo that I wear on my arm to help me finish in a certain amount of time. Right now, my goal is to finish in 4:20, which is close to my marine corps marathon time. I’m thinking it probably won’t happen…I’ll probably be slower. But it’s worth a try. I need to do another marathon this summer to use the 4 hour one and then I bought one that is for 3:40 in anticipation of qualifying for Boston at the MCM this year. Depending on how it goes, it could end up as one of my fabulous UNPAID ENDORSEMENTS!!!

I’m considering a running coach for the summer. I emailed him and everything. Then he told me that I probably just need to increase my endurance runs (ie do more of them), so I’m tempted to take his free information and um not pay him for a 3 month package. But who knows? Perhaps if I tank hard enough during this race I will bite the bullet and splurge?

I am BEYOND excited that this is a marathon and not a triathlon. I still have flashbacks of hyperventilation and terror when I even run close to the Potomac. *SHUDDER*

A Time Consuming Hobby

Why did I pick such a time consuming hobby? No wonder I'm stressed. Other people knit or blog or I dunno scrapbook. Stuff you can break up into chunks or do other stuff while you hobby (can hobby be a verb?). Not so with running...

I've been trying to decide whether I'll stick with the full marathon or switch to the half on March 20th....still can't decide. Off for a 10 or so mile run, hopefully a lot more.

ON THE POSITIVE SIDE (after running 12.5 miles):
I am happy to report that the ducks and geese have returned to DC which means that spring is surely coming!

Snow Blues - SOS!!!!

Today is my second day off from work...2 feet of snow and DC cannot handle it. I've been slacking with postings, partly because I've become dedicated to DailyMile, where I can track my mileage and compare it with other people. But seriously, I just haven't been able to run like I want to. I have to go to the gym and do my runs in 30 minute shifts and it's been driving me insane. I wanted to do 15 miles this weekend and could only manage 10. I honestly don't know if I'll be ready for the marathon in March. :(

I'm amazed that people can run in the snow. I can barely handle walking in the snow, so I think if I were to try to run, I'd end up falling and breaking my ankle. My chances of finishing a marathon in a month and a week are increased by not having broken bones. I just want to move to Florida!!! I'm going stir crazy, pretty much the only thing I want to do all day is stay at the gym but it's so crowded that I can't even handle that!

HELP!!! I'm sending out an SOS!

A To-Do List for Life

I think that goals are important. I'm an extremely hyper person who is always doing something and having a concrete goal can sometimes help me focus my attention (but often I am left with bits and pieces of ideas strewn about my brain haphazardly). So every once in a while, I put on paper some of my life goals.

For all of you wondering how this is relevant to running, one of my life goals was to run a marathon - now it's to qualify for Boston. And I ran 5 miles this morning and it's still really cold in DC. Ok, now we're going to focus on feelings and my random thoughts now, thank you.

Is it weird to put my goals on a public blog? It certainly makes me more accountable to completing any/all o them. And I'm sure that some will change eventually. And I'm thinking maybe I won't post all of them. But I'd like to just talk freely about some of the things I want.

Like....

1. Qualify for the Boston Marathon. This is obviously no secret and I'm in the process of working towards this one.

2. Get EMT training. This is a new one from this morning and it was inspired by 2 things. First, last night there was a huge earthquake in Haiti and they desperately need help. I heard on Democracy Now radio this morning (my new ipod has radio, I know, I'm way cool) that if you are EMT trained they will send you to places that have natural disasters. I would like to go to Haiti today and help but without any training, I'd be more of a burden than help.

3. Visit 100 countries. So far I've hit up 20. Let's go, I don't have 100 years to do this!

4. Do an ultra marathon, which is defined as any race that's longer than the traditional marathon. 50 miles? 100 miles? I'm not sure yet. I think I have to do a few more marathons before I try this. And this will undoubtedly happen in another country to help with #3.

5. Do karaoke. I think this is doable. Maybe. Perhaps. If I ever work up the nerve/develop a taste for sake.

Ok this is NOT my full life list. This is more like my adventure list! Which is lame! Because there's not a ton of "adventures" on here! But I don't really like nature/camping etc, so a lot of the traditional adventures are not on my list. Plus I've already done some of it. Like a safari. Already crossed off my list. Also, swimming in the Potomac. Crossed off my list FOREVER.

Still Cold. Harumph.

I'm still cold. The cold makes me grouchy. This is a grouchy post.

On Saturday, I went out and did 9 miles in the freezing wind. Geez...I didn't even realize how cold I was until I got home. Well...that's not entirely true. I was fine when I was running towards Capital Hill, but when I started on my way home, the wind was just hitting me in the face. It was the kind of wind that takes your breath away and makes you want to puke. Not fun. But it DOES make you feel really hard core. So I muscled through it. and then went home...and wore a snuggie around my apartment...

But it remains cold, which means that I remain unmotivated to go outside at all, let alone for an hour. Will 2010 be the year that I conquer the treadmill? I have no idea, as I still hate all treadmills. I wish that there was an indoor track around here that I could use. As it is, I will have to either face the cold or face the treadmill. Shudder. Horrible prospects!

I have to pick one or the other every day now, because my next marathon is rapidly approaching. Nah, you say, it's not for a while yet! Plenty of time. Oh really? Sign up for a marathon and see if it feels like you have enough time to train. I be you say no!

Right now I am very tired and fat from the holidays...nothing like sitting around a tree drinking wine, er, juice, and eating cookies to make you feel like a runner!