I was reading some previous entries and even nostalgically reading my old blog from when I studied abroad in Spain. In general, I really enjoy blogging because I absolutely love to talk and to share stories and this way it's all consolidated in one place for me. I was always kind of all of the place as a kid. I really, really, really wanted to keep faithful journals like my sister or to be dedicated to a diary like my childhood hero, Anne Frank. But I would buy a journal that I thought was pretty, keep going for about 5 1/2 days, start doodling, forget I had it, buy a new journal 6 months later and then start the process all over again. If I try to read one of them, it makes NO sense at all, particularly because it's almost impossible to ascertain when I was writing because I never found actually put the date on anything. You can occasionally tell if it's Christmas, because I liked to write about getting presents, but in general they are a bleary mess of childish melodrama, shockingly awful sketches, and animal print covers. Yup. Animal print.
So now, I currently have 3 blogs, but this is the only one that I update. I still have the one from Spain and I have my sad attempt at being a personal motivator, TrainerMennone, which died a sad death last year. I have an on again, off again relationship with this blog, with monthes going by without a word, your tears staining your own keyboard (which unfortunately, I cannot see, so that doesn't really bother me) with sorrow and sense of loss.
The thing that's bothering me today is that when I look over the last few entries, I'm not really sharing any valuable information. I'm kind of just a) whining, b) chattering, or c) mumbling. You can even mumble in blogs, those are the entries where it kind of wanders, makes no sense, jumps around, and finally settles with some lame attempt at a pithy, witty end. Have I stopped learning? Do my runs teach me NOTHING anymore? Am I just not running enough? I don't really know the answers to these questions, but I need to decide what I'm getting out of this. Running is not about just going through the motions. I need to feel myself run, understand what it is doing to my body. I want to remind myself of the connection I create with the pavement with each step. How else will I ever run 52.4 miles if I don't take the time to understand what running does to me?
I hate it when people half-ass their way through life. I have to remind myself that everything I'm doing is adding up to something greater. Each day is a part of my whole being and making it worthwhile means making every single moment worthwhile.
Whenever I run a race, my dad says to me, as encouragement I suppose, "Win!" It's less of a cheer than a command and I think that I need to hear it like...every day. It's his way of reminding me to do my best and not float through the race. Taking it to heart, I've decided that I'm not going to float through life. I'm going to take it day by day and WIN every time.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Thursday, May 13, 2010
Goal for my 24 hour race
When I signed up for the 20in24 race, I hadn't really decided if I wanted to set a serious goal. The idea of more than 26.2 miles is hard enough to wrap my head around, let alone an actual concrete milestone to hit.
But I've been really thinking about things and I've decided to go for 52.4 miles. Originally, I was just going to go for 50, $10 for every mile that I run to raise the $500 that I'm fundraising for Back On My Feet. But then I thought...well, the reason why I'm doing this is to do more than a marathon. Why not just try to do 2 marathons in one day?
Logical perhaps to me, although I'm sure the reasoning is lost on most people...
Then I read this fantastic article in the NY Times: Diet and Exercise to the Extremes. Did it inspire me to become a vegan? Well...no, not really. It did inspire me to perhaps make a salad to have with dinner tonight though, does that count? Did it inspire me to want to run 100 miles? No, not really. But it does remind me that the human body is completely capable of doing this. 50 may seem like a lot, but I think I can handle it. And who knows? Maybe 100 won't be so far after that.
Oh yeah, I'm still in the middle of fundraising so don't forget to click and donate!!
Also, I'm only 6 posts away from 100 posts in this little blog! If I post something every day for the next week, we can celebrate...haha yeah right.
But I've been really thinking about things and I've decided to go for 52.4 miles. Originally, I was just going to go for 50, $10 for every mile that I run to raise the $500 that I'm fundraising for Back On My Feet. But then I thought...well, the reason why I'm doing this is to do more than a marathon. Why not just try to do 2 marathons in one day?
Logical perhaps to me, although I'm sure the reasoning is lost on most people...
Then I read this fantastic article in the NY Times: Diet and Exercise to the Extremes. Did it inspire me to become a vegan? Well...no, not really. It did inspire me to perhaps make a salad to have with dinner tonight though, does that count? Did it inspire me to want to run 100 miles? No, not really. But it does remind me that the human body is completely capable of doing this. 50 may seem like a lot, but I think I can handle it. And who knows? Maybe 100 won't be so far after that.
Oh yeah, I'm still in the middle of fundraising so don't forget to click and donate!!
Also, I'm only 6 posts away from 100 posts in this little blog! If I post something every day for the next week, we can celebrate...haha yeah right.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Incredible!
A few weeks ago, I stumbled upon one of the most amazing opportunities in the world: Nike Running Correspondent.
Naturally, I applied, including a quote from this little blog thingy I do here. Now all I can do is wait until July 1st! If you feel nice, post a comment on why I should be the next Nike Running Correspondent so that if any Nike folks visit my blog, they have your recommendation on hand!
Went to the gym during my lunch break today...I tell you, nothing will energize you more for the afternoon than working up a good sweat!
Naturally, I applied, including a quote from this little blog thingy I do here. Now all I can do is wait until July 1st! If you feel nice, post a comment on why I should be the next Nike Running Correspondent so that if any Nike folks visit my blog, they have your recommendation on hand!
Went to the gym during my lunch break today...I tell you, nothing will energize you more for the afternoon than working up a good sweat!
Thursday, May 6, 2010
If you're going to pass, you have to commit
I’d like to start this post off by saying that I do not have a problem with people passing me. I am not so proud that I think that I’m faster than everyone. Running is a popular sport/pastime in DC and people often pass me. Sometimes it’s someone who I don’t really think could pass me. But, I don’t really get bent out of shape about it. I just like to run.
That being said…I’m really not THAT slow either. I am trying to qualify for Boston, after all. Let’s give me SOME credit here.
Also, important to note, I have a serious issue with space when exercising. I blame my mom for this. It’s in my genes. I hate being too close to someone when there’s all this extra space. Like in yoga class, when someone puts their matt 3 inches away from mine when there could be 6 inches of space between us. It makes me antsy. Anxious. I instantly loathe that person. Obviously, this does wonders for my yoga practice.
The point of this story, my good friends?
The other day I was running. (I can hear your groans as I prolong this moment). I was doing a longer run, about 9 miles, so I wasn’t sprinting or going ridiculously fast. I didn’t have any water with me, so it’s not like I was properly fueling. I got to a nice pass along the Potomac (yes, I still have nightmares about my hour in those deathly waters) and was just enjoying a beautiful run on a beautiful day. I had noticed a pair of runners, a guy and girl, who were a little bit behind me, so I sped up a little to get some room between us.
After I had found my pace again, I was a bit surprised to see the girl come up from behind me to pass me. But, like I said, I am not really proud and didn’t really care. I waited for her to get out of my way.
She did NOT. Instead, she passed me and then got right in front of me, like DIRECTLY in front of me, and immediately slowed down. So that she was going about half a pace too slow for me.
OMG ROAD RAGE.
As soon as she did this, I realized that she had no real interest in passing me, she just wanted to get in front of me. Which a) pissed me off and b) made me paranoid about where the guy was, was he waiting behind me? Were they going to try to trap me and steal me as some sort of bizarre slave who would lick their running shoes clean?
So I had to kick it up and ran around her and kept my pace up for a lot longer to avoid them. I really don’t think they were malicious. But for goodness sake, who does that? In a race…I understand the space issues that come with racing. But in the middle of an open sidewalk, running path? With no one else around? Why in the world would that seem like a good idea?
People, please. If you’re going to pass someone, make sure you can commit to it and really pass them. It will make you a faster runner and a far more polite individual.
PS. Signed up for the 2011 London ballot for international runners. I hope I get in! The ballot closed in less than 24 hours, I’m so glad I signed up when I did! In October, I hope I’m writing a post about how I’ll be marathoning through London!
That being said…I’m really not THAT slow either. I am trying to qualify for Boston, after all. Let’s give me SOME credit here.
Also, important to note, I have a serious issue with space when exercising. I blame my mom for this. It’s in my genes. I hate being too close to someone when there’s all this extra space. Like in yoga class, when someone puts their matt 3 inches away from mine when there could be 6 inches of space between us. It makes me antsy. Anxious. I instantly loathe that person. Obviously, this does wonders for my yoga practice.
The point of this story, my good friends?
The other day I was running. (I can hear your groans as I prolong this moment). I was doing a longer run, about 9 miles, so I wasn’t sprinting or going ridiculously fast. I didn’t have any water with me, so it’s not like I was properly fueling. I got to a nice pass along the Potomac (yes, I still have nightmares about my hour in those deathly waters) and was just enjoying a beautiful run on a beautiful day. I had noticed a pair of runners, a guy and girl, who were a little bit behind me, so I sped up a little to get some room between us.
After I had found my pace again, I was a bit surprised to see the girl come up from behind me to pass me. But, like I said, I am not really proud and didn’t really care. I waited for her to get out of my way.
She did NOT. Instead, she passed me and then got right in front of me, like DIRECTLY in front of me, and immediately slowed down. So that she was going about half a pace too slow for me.
OMG ROAD RAGE.
As soon as she did this, I realized that she had no real interest in passing me, she just wanted to get in front of me. Which a) pissed me off and b) made me paranoid about where the guy was, was he waiting behind me? Were they going to try to trap me and steal me as some sort of bizarre slave who would lick their running shoes clean?
So I had to kick it up and ran around her and kept my pace up for a lot longer to avoid them. I really don’t think they were malicious. But for goodness sake, who does that? In a race…I understand the space issues that come with racing. But in the middle of an open sidewalk, running path? With no one else around? Why in the world would that seem like a good idea?
People, please. If you’re going to pass someone, make sure you can commit to it and really pass them. It will make you a faster runner and a far more polite individual.
PS. Signed up for the 2011 London ballot for international runners. I hope I get in! The ballot closed in less than 24 hours, I’m so glad I signed up when I did! In October, I hope I’m writing a post about how I’ll be marathoning through London!
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Something new to occupy my time?
Well now that I'm all recovered and bored again, I need to find something to occupy my time while I wait for the Marine Corps Marathon to qualify for Boston. You know, other than train for a marathon, be a bridesmaid in 2 weddings, continue to excel in my job, plan imaginary trips to Europe, clean my house, and take Spanish and/or Italian lessons.
I HAVE FOUND IT!
THE RACE OF RACES!!!!!
BWAHAHAHH!
Ok, stay with me here. I know that it looks kinda crazy. But you have to a) acknowledge that I am crazy and b) understand that I have become quite capable of distinguishing between events that are fun just because they sound crazy and events that I actually want to do. I have been nonchalantly deleting all emails that come to me asking me to sign up for another triathlon, because God knows that I am NOT doing one of those again. Why does a 24 hour race appeal to me? Well...
1) I love to run. I would love to spend a day running! Just all day! No other time committments, no other activities that I will have to do. Just running, running, running.
2) It would actually help me to train for the Marine Corps Marathon and Boston.
3) It's in JULY and I LOVE to run in the heat!
4) SOFT. PRETZELS.
I think I'm talking myself into this...
I HAVE FOUND IT!
THE RACE OF RACES!!!!!
BWAHAHAHH!
Ok, stay with me here. I know that it looks kinda crazy. But you have to a) acknowledge that I am crazy and b) understand that I have become quite capable of distinguishing between events that are fun just because they sound crazy and events that I actually want to do. I have been nonchalantly deleting all emails that come to me asking me to sign up for another triathlon, because God knows that I am NOT doing one of those again. Why does a 24 hour race appeal to me? Well...
1) I love to run. I would love to spend a day running! Just all day! No other time committments, no other activities that I will have to do. Just running, running, running.
2) It would actually help me to train for the Marine Corps Marathon and Boston.
3) It's in JULY and I LOVE to run in the heat!
4) SOFT. PRETZELS.
I think I'm talking myself into this...
Monday, March 22, 2010
Euphoria!
3:59:36!!!!
I feel like everyone should know that I finished a marathon in 3:59:36!! Without the best training, without jet packs on my back, without having to get an IV drip at the end (although I did have to visit the medical tent), I finished 26.2 miles in UNDER 4 hours. My joy peaked throughout the weekend as I celebrated my ability to walk (however slowly) without aid after running my personal best and the acknowledgement that Boston is perhaps actually within my reach. I feel like this is a life changing event and my life has been enhanced greatly. I looked at myself in the mirror on Saturday and thought to myself, “there is more to me than what used to be.”
And yet, nothing has REALLY changed. I got up this morning and went to work. There was no huge celebration for my victory. My boyfriend took me out on Saturday for a falafel dinner and then we went home and passed out. My parents were strangely absent, due to my insistence that this was not an important race and I was not going to do well and didn’t need everyone to be there. Today I am at work and beyond the inner circle of friends that I have made, no one knows that the reason why I am walking so slowly/like a cripple is because I pushed my body beyond normal limitations. My bank account is no larger, my goals in life have pretty much stayed the same. The race felt life-altering upon completion, but now all it serves to do is make my own life, as happy and busy as it is, seem mundane and dull by comparison. No one cheers me on as I complete my daily tasks at work. At the grocery store, no one is yelling at me, “don’t quit!!” I do not put on body glide to face the other commuters on the bus and I do not slurp any GU to help me make it up and down the stairs of my office.
In this race, I pushed myself harder than I had before. For the first 20 miles, I was looking at my watch and pushing myself to make each mile by a certain time. I was IN the race, rather than just participating. I didn’t expect to WIN, but once I passed 14 miles in 2 hours, I knew that I was going to PR. And I wanted it, badly. In this way, this race was better than any other I’ve ever done. After running a race like this, I know that I can never go back to just running a race. This race set the standard for any race that I may do in the future.
For a while I thought I might make the Boston qualifying (3:40). But I didn’t, and in a way, I didn’t want to. I wanted to save that moment. And in a way, I couldn’t. By mile 21, I was pretty much done. Thoughts of quitting flirted with me. The race took an ugly turn for the last 6 miles, through junkyards and over bridges in Anacostia. No one was cheering. I didn’t want to run anymore. I wanted to walk. I slowed down significantly, turning my sub-9 minute miles into over 10 minute miles. By the time I finally found my boyfriend at mile 26, I yelled to him “under 4 hours!!” because I was still barely under the 4 hour mark. He pushed me forward – if I hadn’t seen him, if he hadn’t given me that last burst of energy, I think I would’ve hit 4 hours. But I did. Running past the finish line, I thought that everyone should be amazed by my accomplishment.
After finishing and taking as many post-race goodies as I could fit in my arms (and getting the most BEAUTIFUL medal yet), I tottered around until I found my boyfriend. Then collapsed. My friend GutsyGeise came to show her undying support and I was cranky and unbelievable un-charming to her. After lying in the sun for about an hour, I declared, “I want to go home!” like a stubborn 5 year old and then limped slowly around in a circle before stating “I want to find the medical tent!” I was feeling incredibly nauseous and walking did not help. So my patient companions found the medical tent for me and waited outside while I was given an anti-nausea pill and sat for a few minutes in the shade (the weather, btw, was GORGEOUS and sunny and warm for the race. But almost hot upon completion). Some guy tried to chat with me about the hills of the course and I couldn’t understand why I had to be social while sitting in the medical tent. 3 people were sitting/lying down with IVs in their arms and a tiny part of me felt that they must have run harder than me.
And since then I have basically been sleeping, eating, and walking slowly and unsteadily around Washington, DC. In a small way, this is one of my proudest achievements. It is something that I did on my own that not many of my peers have done. It is an accomplishment that I am savoring, holding as my own. I humbly acknowledge that there are plenty of people out there who can do much better than me, but at the same time I am actually allowing myself to feel pride for this. I find that to be kind of hard to do, but at the same time, I really believe that I earned it. I’m not running around with my medal on (although I did wear it around my apartment after seeing that I placed 982 in the whole race), but I’m not going to just let this be another weekend. I want to work hard and do better and get this euphoric feeling back again. I want to earn it and not just have it be handed to me.
I am ready to qualify for Boston.
I feel like everyone should know that I finished a marathon in 3:59:36!! Without the best training, without jet packs on my back, without having to get an IV drip at the end (although I did have to visit the medical tent), I finished 26.2 miles in UNDER 4 hours. My joy peaked throughout the weekend as I celebrated my ability to walk (however slowly) without aid after running my personal best and the acknowledgement that Boston is perhaps actually within my reach. I feel like this is a life changing event and my life has been enhanced greatly. I looked at myself in the mirror on Saturday and thought to myself, “there is more to me than what used to be.”
And yet, nothing has REALLY changed. I got up this morning and went to work. There was no huge celebration for my victory. My boyfriend took me out on Saturday for a falafel dinner and then we went home and passed out. My parents were strangely absent, due to my insistence that this was not an important race and I was not going to do well and didn’t need everyone to be there. Today I am at work and beyond the inner circle of friends that I have made, no one knows that the reason why I am walking so slowly/like a cripple is because I pushed my body beyond normal limitations. My bank account is no larger, my goals in life have pretty much stayed the same. The race felt life-altering upon completion, but now all it serves to do is make my own life, as happy and busy as it is, seem mundane and dull by comparison. No one cheers me on as I complete my daily tasks at work. At the grocery store, no one is yelling at me, “don’t quit!!” I do not put on body glide to face the other commuters on the bus and I do not slurp any GU to help me make it up and down the stairs of my office.
In this race, I pushed myself harder than I had before. For the first 20 miles, I was looking at my watch and pushing myself to make each mile by a certain time. I was IN the race, rather than just participating. I didn’t expect to WIN, but once I passed 14 miles in 2 hours, I knew that I was going to PR. And I wanted it, badly. In this way, this race was better than any other I’ve ever done. After running a race like this, I know that I can never go back to just running a race. This race set the standard for any race that I may do in the future.
For a while I thought I might make the Boston qualifying (3:40). But I didn’t, and in a way, I didn’t want to. I wanted to save that moment. And in a way, I couldn’t. By mile 21, I was pretty much done. Thoughts of quitting flirted with me. The race took an ugly turn for the last 6 miles, through junkyards and over bridges in Anacostia. No one was cheering. I didn’t want to run anymore. I wanted to walk. I slowed down significantly, turning my sub-9 minute miles into over 10 minute miles. By the time I finally found my boyfriend at mile 26, I yelled to him “under 4 hours!!” because I was still barely under the 4 hour mark. He pushed me forward – if I hadn’t seen him, if he hadn’t given me that last burst of energy, I think I would’ve hit 4 hours. But I did. Running past the finish line, I thought that everyone should be amazed by my accomplishment.
After finishing and taking as many post-race goodies as I could fit in my arms (and getting the most BEAUTIFUL medal yet), I tottered around until I found my boyfriend. Then collapsed. My friend GutsyGeise came to show her undying support and I was cranky and unbelievable un-charming to her. After lying in the sun for about an hour, I declared, “I want to go home!” like a stubborn 5 year old and then limped slowly around in a circle before stating “I want to find the medical tent!” I was feeling incredibly nauseous and walking did not help. So my patient companions found the medical tent for me and waited outside while I was given an anti-nausea pill and sat for a few minutes in the shade (the weather, btw, was GORGEOUS and sunny and warm for the race. But almost hot upon completion). Some guy tried to chat with me about the hills of the course and I couldn’t understand why I had to be social while sitting in the medical tent. 3 people were sitting/lying down with IVs in their arms and a tiny part of me felt that they must have run harder than me.
And since then I have basically been sleeping, eating, and walking slowly and unsteadily around Washington, DC. In a small way, this is one of my proudest achievements. It is something that I did on my own that not many of my peers have done. It is an accomplishment that I am savoring, holding as my own. I humbly acknowledge that there are plenty of people out there who can do much better than me, but at the same time I am actually allowing myself to feel pride for this. I find that to be kind of hard to do, but at the same time, I really believe that I earned it. I’m not running around with my medal on (although I did wear it around my apartment after seeing that I placed 982 in the whole race), but I’m not going to just let this be another weekend. I want to work hard and do better and get this euphoric feeling back again. I want to earn it and not just have it be handed to me.
I am ready to qualify for Boston.
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